Nick
Alpha
pov
Sitting here in my office waiting with my Beta Roan pissed off about yet another meeting I have to attend. I'm a 265 pound 6 foot 7 inch muscle machine of one of the largest packs around. I'm a beast, take no prisoners, and don’t give a shit about feelings. I don't care to hear excuses, just get the job done. I have built a reputation of not caring, not wanting any weaknesses.
Growing up being an only child my parents were the biggest pieces of shit there were. My dad abused me to make me "stronger" and my mom just watched not caring. Hell sometimes she would even participate. If it happens behind closed doors no one knows right, and if clothes can cover it then no one can see. My body is littered with scars, and tattoos have only been able to cover so much. The mental scars are there as well, and therapy might of been able to help, but I don’t have time for that shit. I don't want a mate because I don't want kids. I don't want to repeat the cycle, or take the chance of ending up with a shitty mate. Moon Goddess or not, It's not happening, and if I do find her there is no fucking way I will want her. Rejection can be done easily if you don’t care.
My Beta Roan has been my best friend and confidint since I was a kid. While the years went by I knew I could always talk to him to get me through my personal hell. When my 18th birthday rolled around, my father thought I should get a proper birthday celebration with a major beating in store. Little did he fucking know.... I was waiting for this day. I day I could challenge him to take his position. I waited for hours for the sun to come up and for them to make their way down towards my room. I knew my mom wouldn’t miss such a momentous occasion.
When I heard them coming to my door I waited in the middle of my room with a grin on my face. I could hear them laughing on the other side and this fueled my rage to end this insanity. I was not going to be their punching bag any more. When my door flew open I shifted running straight at my dad and caught him before he could shift. In one quick motion I grabbed him around the nape of his neck and snapped it. Dropping his lifeless body on the ground I then looked towards my mother. That Bitch had the audacity to yell at me about what a disappointment I was. How I was nothing but a drain on them financially and waisted their time. My wolf just smirked and slowly stalked towards her. When she knew what was going to happening she begged for her life. I thought to myself why now after all this time, now you care.
I grabbed her by the neck and snapped her neck also. And I don't have any regrets. What they did and put me through no kid should ever have to suffer.
Who would want me anyways... I'm broken, scarred, and can't trust anyone. Well except Roan. That fucker I trust with my life! My warriors know about the scars, but dont know my story and I plan on keeping it that way. But now I'm 23 and the council is urging me to find a mate. I don't want one but if I don't find one, they will find one for me. The pack needs a luna, you need support blah blah blah... like hell I do.
Wanna know how much I hate these council meetings? There are no words. Sitting here at my desk with my Beta at my side, I'm trying my hardest to act like I'm paying attention. But every meeting its the same topic...a MATE.
“You do know you need to find a mate, the pack needs it's Luna" Frank says.
"Yes I know,
slamming my fists down
don't think I haven't forgotten. You remind me of it at every meeting we have!"
“And yet you still have a ball every year and still haven't found anyone, you know by your 25th birthday, you.."
"Yeah I know, you will pick one for me. I know, she has to be here somewhere right?"
“Alpha we are just trying to help" Jeff adds in.
"I know, I know. The ball is tomorrow and hopefully I will find her." Rubbing my hand down my face.
The councilmembers start whispering and I excuse everyone telling them to get out. The discussion is over. At least for now I hope. I hate having this discussion every week it seems. Either on the phone or by email or sticky note. If I have to choose I would rather have what the Moon Goddess chose, but how do I know that they would be perfect for me. What if she is a complete dud, I will just reject her. That seems to be the most logical solution. When the council members walk out I look at Roan
“You know at some point you will have to make a decision right?" He says.
"I know. She's gotta be out there right." I look out my window contemplating my life. How will I even act when I find her. I know every Alpha’s goal is to get a mate and have pups. I don’t want either because all it is is a weakness. Something another pack or enemies can hold over you.
“But what if she's not? Then what? Are you really going to leave this decision up to them to choose one for you?”
"I hope to Goddess I can find her! These other unmated females are driving me insane!"
‘Did any new people say they were coming that don't usually come?"