Prologue
Looking up into Alex's big green eyes, I can feel my heart shatter. I'm ashamed of the woman I was. His tears stream down his face. The tears crash onto my face, mixing with my own. The plaid blanket wrapped around us can only shield us from so many eyes. I'm thankful Paige and Colin left already. Paige would have a field day seeing me hurt. It's not like I don't deserve it.
"Thank you for at least giving me tonight. I spoke to Alpha Stephen. I'm set to leave tomorrow."
His tears fall faster, but I know they're not for me. They are for him. Being saddled with a mate like me is a terrible thing.
"Okay," he chokes out.
I wrap my arms around him, letting his scent calm me one last time. The sweet strawberry scent that will forever be tattooed on my brain.
I almost want to ask him for his forgiveness again. It didn't work the last three hundred times, but maybe it will now. I shake my head clear of the urge. I can't keep making this harder than it has to be. Alex wants to be free of me, so that's what he will get. The pain it causes me doesn't matter. I just want him to be happy.
Happy? Vera whines in my head. He can't be happy without us. We can't be happy without him.
I know we can't, but we'll figure it out.
We can't let him do this to us, Amber. He needs us and we need him.
He's made his choice, Vera. There's nothing we can do.
Alex's hand runs through my brown strands, and I'm reminded of our first night together. It had been nothing short of magical. He is and will probably always be the best I've ever had. That night ended in bliss. The days following it were bliss. Until he found out that I slept with his best friend's dad who was trying to kill us all. Everything went to shit then.
The memory plays like a movie in my head. Catching him sloppy and drunk with another girl's tongue in his mouth. That moment was the moment that I finally understood the pain I've been causing for the last three years. I decided then that I was no longer Amber the Homewrecker.
The words Alex spoke afterwards, though, those are the reason I'm leaving the only home I've ever known.
"Why am I here, Alex? Did you call me to meet just so that I would see this?" My trembling fingers point between the two of them. "I understand my past is too much for you, but please, just reject me. Let me go on with my life peacefully."
"You don't deserve peace. You are evil. You deserve a life of constant pain. The same pain you put those people through." Alex's drunk voice is entangled with hatred.
The movie in my head ends. Alex is right. All I deserve is pain. Goddess knows how much I've caused. All the homes I've wrecked, all the families I've ruined.
The fire is dwindling down, the pack members have cleared out. The celebration of Paige's happily ever after is over. I could feel jealous. I'm sure the old me would. I would feel insecure and jump into bed with whoever would let me. But the new me feels sad. Sad that I'm leaving my home. Sad that I ruined my chance at a happily ever after. Sad that I hurt so many people. I scoot myself away from my mate, or my almost mate, and stand up. It's time to say goodbye.
"Alex, let's get this over with. I will leave early in the morning. Probably before you get up," I whisper.
"Of course. This is for the best, Amber. We will go our separate ways and find happiness elsewhere." Alex stands and faces me.